Complete Surrender

I write to you today, that I am completely surrendered to the WILL OF G'D.

I have banished the scale, I truly have no idea where I am on the scale. I have no
plans as to when I will get back on one. I am learning to be free.

I am erasing every worldly perception as to how I am to act, eat, etc. I can not
live a life with half of me and half of Him. It doesn't work that way. I already
know that all me doesn't work, so I have to trust that all Him will.

I tried to mix the Carbohydrate Addicts Diet and the Maker's Diet. That does
not work. I kept hearing in the back of my brain, you are still not being free.
You are still doing this with you. 

I have to stop telling myself lies.
LIE...
I have no control.
TRUTH...
2 Timothy 1:7  For God has not given us a spirit of fear and 
timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.

2 Peter 1: 3-9  His divine power has granted to us all things 
that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge 
of him who called us to his own glory and excellence, by 
which he has granted to us his precious and very great 
promises, so that through them you may become partakers 
of the divine nature, having escaped from the corruption 
that is in the world because of sinful desire. 5 For this very 
reason, make every effort to supplement your faith with 
virtue,[e] and virtue with knowledge, 6 and knowledge with 
self-control, and self-control with steadfastness, and 
steadfastness with godliness,7 and godliness with brotherly 
affection, and brotherly affection with love. 8 For if these 
qualities[f] are yours and are increasing, they keep you 
from being ineffective or unfruitful in the knowledge of our 
Lord Jesus Christ. 9 For whoever lacks these qualities is so 
nearsighted that he is blind, having forgotten that he was 
cleansed from his former sins.


So I am sorry, if you feel as though I have let you down. I have no idea exactly
where this road goes, except that it's going to a good place. I believe that the bible
is the infallible WORD OF G'D. I have already proven a million times over, my
plans are not good plans and that the worlds plans are not good plans.

I want balance. I want freedom. I want good for me and my family. I do not want
the worry and fear anymore. I do not want my children growing up with the world's
perception of what is right or wrong. Whether they are fat, or pretty, or complete.

I am not a number on a scale! My beauty comes from within and shines out!

I started a notebook today With 4 keys of becoming "Truly Beautiful." Start one
for yourself!

KEYS:

#1 Renew Your Mind (to what the bible says you are what you have, and what you
                                  can do. This requires work. Get into the word and write down
                                  every promise that pertains to you.)
#2 Recognize Your Lies ( write down every lie you tell yourself. I am fat, I am ugly, I
                                      have a lazy spirit, I am ugly on the inside, I have bad hair, I
                                      can't manage my household chores, I'm tired, I don't feel good,
                                      this hurts, I can not get through to my kids...what ever you are
                                      saying that directly contradicts what the word says)
#3 Take Every Thought Captive (Every time you hear a contrary thought back it up by
                                      speaking what The Word says. Example: Thought 'I am 
                                      ugly' say out loud "I am beautifully and wonderfully 
                                      made PS 139:14)
#4 Change Your Confessions (replace every lie with truth. Confess them every
                                      morning, noon, and night. What you have today is what
                                      you said yesterday. So what you say today you will have
                                      tomorrow. What you say determines what you believe.)

I love you. I hope that you can forgive me for being double minded. I just need to
find the right path and I am willing to share it... GOOD OR BAD!

HUGGZZ

Not #100days...It's a Lifetime

After seeking His will about this #100 thing, I realized there was no way that
I could do it without glorifying myself, or simply the things that He does. It is
not 100 days, it's a life time.

I prepared a video, so that I could speak directly to you.

I will be posting my food again as of tomorrow.

HUGGZ

#100 Starts Tomorrow?

I initially thought that I was ready to just jump on the band wagon and do this
100 day thing. I tried to grabbed the bull by the horns a little too quickly. It was
really silly to try and do this on a Sabbath for one.

My challah bread came out so beautifully last night! It took me several tries, but I may
actually have it down now. I go a little extra for our Shabbat dinners, and avoiding the
spread would have been a bit painful!

I also didn't think about having guest tonight for dinner. I just am not just going to
serve them a whole food meal! I am going to dote on them being with us. I also am
not going to deprive myself.

To  fully think this out, I am thinking that Sunday is a better day to actually
start. I also am thinking that I should have a back up plan for days that provide
stumbling blocks, like next week's event at church.

So, in my heart of hearts, I am planning on giving this 120%. As I go from carb
addict, to a completely delivered person...In J'sus Name. I don't want to gain weight
during this transformation either.

I tried six times this morning to make a video for you, I have found another area
in my life that could use some work! Yea! Public speaking! Hee Hee

Have an awesome day!
HUGGZ

#100DAYS

Last night I was watching this video of a mom and daughter duo committing to
100 days of fitness. I thought 'hmm, I love a challenge.' I made a list of things
that are changing or still need changing in my life.

*Less of me, more of Him.
*Weight loss.
*Deliverance of addictions (food and tobacco)
*Becoming a G'dly mother and wife.
*Effectively ministering to and loving the people around me.

It also got me to thinking, about how many days it takes to form a habit, or
even break a habit. Some say twenty-one days, some say more like 266 days.
One hundred is right there almost in the middle.

I had a verse to meditate on last night, Romans 8:37 ( Nay, in all these 
things we are more than conquerors through Him that 
loved us.) Through out the night 100 possibilities of 100 days ran through my
brain.

During prayer this morning, it was revealed that this was my own en devour.
That it was good, and permissible, but this is my idea. If I am to fail, He will still be
here to pick me up. I want G'd to be glorified through every I set myself to do,
because He is the power within me.

So how about #100 days of setting Him before me? As I approached this take
on it, I sensed His presence.  So for the next #100 days:

*I will continue to seek His face. Developing a relationship with the author of my
life. (2-3 hours a day reading, meditating, and hearing His word. No secular movies,
shows, music etc.) Just constantly putting Him first, listening to praise music through
out the day as I am doing chores or writing to you.

*Continue to seek out and confess over myself, His truth. Aspiring to only eat
unprocessed, whole foods...that fuel my body. I will only drink water, coffee,
lemon water, cucumber water, etc. No sugar.

*Every week I will add 5 minutes to my exercise, starting at 15 minutes today.

*Every week I will smoke one less cigarette a day. Yesterday I smoked seven,
I think, but today and though the rest of the week I will limit myself to 6, then
next week 5. I almost feel as this is a silly ambition, because I know that I have
already been delivered from the actual addiction, so I am expecting any day for
it to disappear from my sight anyways.

Romans 12:1-2 says: I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the 
mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, 
holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.

And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed 

by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that 

good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

This is my focus passage for this 100 days. If anyone wants to tag along, let me know.

I would be especially interested what He is doing in your life also! 

Here is my Day 1 video. It was actually the first video I think I've ever made of

myself, so please be kind. Remember I am not perfect. I am not trying to be. I am 

just a work in progress. 

Have an awesome day! HUGGZZ

UPDATE

The reason my update has been taking so long, is because I'm still
figuring some things out. I am not even sure when I'm going to weigh
again. The scale has been stowed away.

As you might know, I went through a time of fasting. Ever since April
7th, my whole person has been changing, from the inside out. I have a
peace about my future, I have more ambition, and almost constant joy.

I've experienced deliverance in so many different ways that I can not
express fully or list completely everything at one time. I know that you
all want to talk about food though....

The first two days of the fast it was impress on me, to completely not
worry at all about food. I ate what I wanted, but by the 3rd day He
started to impress upon me unprocessed foods with no sugar or meat.
The 5th, 6th, and 7th day I cleansed my body with fruits, veggies, and
brown rice.

Now here's where the majority of you walk away. I am not any kind of
plan. I am trusting the L'rd and confessing over my body the promises I
have in Him.

What is firm I am completely Kosher (not rabbinical), refraining from pork
and shellfish.

The exception: if I were to be at someone's home and they had prepared
for me food, and did not know...I will accept as to not offend or hinder.
The majority of my food is unprocessed. This is a day by day stepping
out into faith. Believing that my chains are gone and I am set free.

The understanding: All is okay for me. There is no condemnation for those
in Chr'st.

The confession: I do not crave processed foods or cigarettes any more,
because they do not do me any good. I do crave whole foods (G'd's foods),
that fuel my body and keep me prepared to run the race.

This has really been a process for me. First I received the word, then I heard
the word, now I am apply it. If you are still with me then I strongly suggest
watching this.

Honestly, I started to gain a little back. Everyday though I see that with continually
confessing over my body G'd's will and truth, things are changing faster than I can
write.

Everyday I am making better choices. I am not craving the things that are usually my
stumbling blocks. You may say that it is mind over matter, but it is more spirit over
soul and body.

I have more and more energy every day. Chores are getting done, and I even find it
hard to sit for long periods of time. Know that this is so much more than food and
cigarettes. It is being a G'dly mother and wife. It is having forethought for what needs
to be done and how to bless others around me. It is how to act in love no matter what,
being slow to speak and get angry, being quick to listen.

I spend about 2-4 hours in the Word a day. Then meditate on it through out the day.
Setting Him before me, I have developed a relationship with Him that supersedes any
other.

Have an awesome day!
HUGGZ